Tag: Social media

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HOW SOCIAL MEDIA CONTROLS OUR THOUGHTS AND MAKES DECISIONS FOR US

In 2016, I met my best friend for the first time. In 2016, I entered a new phase. 2016 was my best year – whether it’s true or not, let’s just follow the trend. According to social media posts, people are missing 2016, so let me join too and say something I miss about 2016. The person may not even remember anything about 2016 ooh. See how social media controls us? There’s still more.

I’ve just been seeing the 2016 throwback pictures trend on social media with people saying what 2016 was for them, and some using the tagline “2026 is the new 2016”.

I’m guessing that not all of us may agree with it, but we would go ahead and use it in our posts anyway because many people are using it. We agree online because people are already supporting it. Most times we don’t make decisions on our own. We think we do, but we don’t. Our decisions are not from us, they are from the majority.

You know how you wake up, and you have a list of things you want to do, or there are things you’ve decided not to do, and somewhere along the way, you see people talking about those things, doing those things, you will now join them? That’s how it is with social media. In fact, it’s even more with social media because people wey dey there, plenty.

Before you argue, close your eyes for a minute, and try to recall all the times you changed your mind to go with the “flow”, the times you shifted your schedule, your plans, the times you changed your mindset within seconds, so that you will not be odd. Make e no be like say you no follow.

We have those moments. Not many people really like to be odd, or not belong.

I think this way about something, I start talking with people, and all of them have another thought different from mine. At that point, what we do 99.9% of the time is to keep quiet about what we think, or even change our mind so all of us will “agree”.

I’m not saying that everytime you change your mind to agree with others it’s bad, no, sometimes we are wrong, and when we see or hear the right thing, we should take it. It’s part of learning.

What I’m talking about is something that you don’t like or are not comfortable with, or you’ve never thought of, and then you see people doing that thing or hear people talk about that thing – it then begins to get your attention.

A lot of times we don’t really look inside us to see if this thing is actually okay with you. Some of us now, if they ask you what you like, what you stand for, what you cannot do, even what you believe, we don’t know.

Let’s look at the throwback picture trend again; if we are honest with ourselves, we’ll realize that the reason you posted your own pictures is because it’s trending, because many people are doing it, maybe because we saw famous people join. Not that you planned it. Not that it has been on your mind. That’s exactly what I’m talking about!

This is in line with what research says. Semra Gunduc in his research report explained that the way social media networks work means that many people reposting a trend can bring many others into agreement even if they weren’t thinking about it deeply at first.

Our opinions, our actions and even reactions to things, are shaped by social media. We go to social media for almost everything we need.

That’s also how many of us join discussions that we don’t know how it started. They are dragging someone online, we join without knowing the full story. Many people are supporting something, we join, and we don’t know what the thing is really about.

There is something that we normally do. Before we comment on any post, we look at the comment section to know what people are saying, we look at the number of reactions – likes, shares. By the time we are done, our original thought or opinion is gone.

We see something on social media, and we believe it, and start sharing. Because the person that posted it is shouting, “share this video”, you start sharing, most times without considering if that post or video is worth sharing. We don’t know how true it is, but for many of us, once it’s on social media, we take it.

Many times, people are just posting what they think and how they feel, not facts. You must not think and feel like them. We need to be able to weigh what we take from social media.

Taking everything you see there is a problem because we stop being ourselves. It’s a problem because we can go around spreading false information and they can be dangerous.

Results from PUBMED research shows that false information on health is high on social media. Smoking, drugs, and other health related issues have so much false information on Twitter, and on other social media. See what we’re talking about?

The first step is to be aware.

Now we know that this happens to us on social media, and we have accepted that it is true. We are conscious of it now.

The next step is to begin to protect ourselves.

Anytime a challenge on social media goes viral, pause and think about it first to be sure. Anytime somebody posts something, and there are likes, shares, comments that are in support, wait first, and ask questions. Who is this person? Are they trustworthy? What’s the full story? Don’t just join. Don’t just agree.

Before you tap share, before you like, before you use the information, ask yourself:Is this really my opinion, or is it just loud? Is this information correct? Is this the right person to give this kind of information?

I think it’s not too late to say happy new year

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WHAT IS THE PLACE OF PARENTING IN EDUCATION?

Maybe we should redefine what we assume education is. It’s quite disheartening to see that people think going to school is education. It’s not merely that. People attend schools and still come out uneducated. Education is more than just going to school.

Google tells us that “the origin of the word ‘education’ is from the Latin root educare. ‘Educare’ means ‘to lead out or bring forth’. It implies that through organized questions knowledge, understanding and the potential of children have to be brought out.”

According to Jaypee digital.com, “Education is a systematic process through which a child or an adult acquires knowledge, experience, skill and sound attitude. From the origin of the word ‘education’, we can see that to educate is to guide an individual into becoming, realizing his/her full potentials. The definition following after, adds that knowledge , experience and skill have to be acquired before we can say a person is educated.

Education is the development of the mind of an individual, and the revelation of their innate capacities for solutions provision. These are things we should look out for before we can say education is or has taken place. Education goes beyond teaching, it is coaching, training, mentoring. We seem to be leaving our children in the hands of the teachers because we believe that education of children is for the teachers to do. We’ve never really thought about the meaning of education, so I get.

But, it’s high time we dealt with this because it’s a dangerous thing. It means that you are not part of the development of that child, and the results show in different ways. The fact that they spend more time in school than with you should give you a sense of urgency. It’s even more dangerous now that social media is also teaching them. Yes! Every time spent on social media, is education. Something is shifting in their minds, that’s why they pick up whatever they see.

Now, what should parents do? To start with, from conception, you should speak whatever you want to see in your child, that’s where they begin to be shaped, yes, your words are that powerful. What does this have to do with education, you ask? Education deals with systematic acquisition of knowledge, skills, experience, ultimately guiding him to becoming the best version of himself. The goal of education is to bring out what they have inside of them, to help nurture it.

When you are pregnant with your child, it is important to make positive affirmations on that child before they come, so the process of educating the child will be easier. You could call them solution providers, pacesetters etc. So from the womb, you’re already channeling them, they are feeling it, of course you have to continue after birth.When these children are born, you monitor closely for their traits. By the time they begin to make simple sentences, their behavior begins to show. This is the age of discovery. Parents should be very watchful from this point to pick up on the various characters that are shown. From their traits you have ideas of what they will become. This is also where you start educating them, they are not too young.

Let’s establish the fact that education of children starts in the home, not at school.

Based on their traits, you guide them properly. For instance, there are children that always want to flip through the pages of books even when they cannot read the words. Once you notice it, you begin to guide them in that direction; check what books particularly catch their interests, and make them available, take them to the library to see different genres of books, and be attentive to the books that draw their attention.

You can read the books aloud, using imagination to paint vivid pictures regardless of whether they are fiction or nonfiction. Whatever you notice in your child; always curious and never backing down, loves to try out things/experiment with things even when others seem convinced, etc, should all be nurtured. Make it grow, and grow and grow with proper guidance. Don’t quench it. A lot of parents make this mistake. When you do so, you’ve begun to tamper with their original selves, their identity, their core is reshaped. They begin to move from who they really are.

When you discover what exactly your children love, their interests, you’ll the able to place them on the right path. By the time they are going into the higher institutions, they are very clear on what they want.

What next? We help them gain the knowledge, by providing the right resources for them. We also enable them get the skills needed for the field they are venturing into. What skills are needed? Where do they need to go to acquire these skills? What resources do they need? These are questions that we will need to answer, to act accordingly.

We place them in challenging situations, situations that will take them out of their comfort zone, to help build their experience. Using the same instance on reading, when they have gotten comfortable with a particular text, give them a higher one(of course still within their interest), and make them review, explain, summarize and give their personal opinion, on the texts. Regardless of whatever category of books.

Children should be able to give their personal opinions on textbooks, not just literature, and it starts from the home. Empowered them from the home. The goal is to make them independent, critical, creative thinkers, armed to identify problems, and provide solutions. It’s only then that we can say that we have educated people.

This also brings me to something else that is crucial; forcing our children to live our dreams for us. The dreams we had but couldn’t attain at some point, is not a legacy for our children to carry on. Let’s not force them into something, just to boost our ego, or to give us a false sense of satisfaction. False because your dream is always your dream, and the satisfaction you get from achieving your dream yourself, is not comparable with your child getting it. Matter of fact, you’re never too old to go for your dreams. Your children are their own beings not an extension of you. Yes, they are your offspring, but still humans themselves. People with emotions like us, with thoughts like us, with aspirations, like us. We may not realize it, but we are ruining them by making them fulfil our dreams for us.

Sometimes, we think our children are not intelligent. No! They are not functioning where they are meant to function. We have probably pushed them into what we think is best for them. Additionally, let’s not damage our children by giving them phones. It’s almost a norm to see children with phones. Their lives have not started yet, and it’s being damaged. When a baby is crying, please the remedy should not be a phone. Having children use ipads at home is so not right. Children are developing dependency on phones, they are getting addicted to phones. It’s so alarming! Please keep them busy, but not with phones. Whether you censor what they do or not, it doesn’t matter, the damage is going on either ways. Prolonged exposure to phone reduce the attention span of the users as the days go back, how do we educate a generation with short attention span? Medically, there is something called nomophobia(no mobile phone phobia): This means that someone is afraid of being without a smartphone. Children are already going through nomophobia. What kind of children are we raising?

Parents please let’s turn this around. We can’t be the ones destroying our children.As parents, we should not enable examination malpractice of any kind: paying for special centers where exams would be written for them, bribing teachers to provide answers to questions, etc. Train your children to be confident, in addition to the aforementioned, and you’ll see them soar. The foundation we lay in the home is what they’ll build on throughout their lives. Let’s not do this.

This is where we fit into the equation. We have such a critical role, the education of our children cannot be left to schools, we mold these destinies, so we had better take on our role. We should know our children from cradle, and guide the steering appropriately.

Let’s not create a vacuum and expect the teachers to fill in, you’ll lose your children that way. Even if you have started on the wrong foot, you can re-right the wrongs. There’s still a chance to discover them, even if they’re in secondary school already.

Right now, we need a generation that can think independently, a generation that has strong confidence, a generation that cannot be silenced, a generation that is proactive, an enlightened generation, a generation of solution providers, a bold generation, and education is still the key. When we educate our children, we arm them with the above, and more. We have just been doing it wrongly. We cannot keep repeating the same mistakes, don’t you think?

Parents, let’s rise to the occasion. Let us redefine what education has been assumed to be, in our time. Let us right the wrongs. Let us begin to educate our children. Let’s work with a sense of urgency, there’s no time. The change will begin with us. Let’s help our children become.

Ultimately, the Holy spirit is available to guide us aright. Especially for those that are start “late”.

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SOCIAL MEDIA: IS LIFE AWAY FROM THE SPACE POSSIBLE?

Someone once told me that I should have been born in the 1950s because, how can I not be on all social media spaces? It’s a choice ooh. We all have choices to make and Joshua in the Josh. 24 when he was telling the children of Israel his last words, asked them to choose whom they would serve. Whatever eats most of your time, whatever you feel you can’t do without, has become what you serve whether you admit it or not. Did I say that you shouldn’t be on social media? No, except if you’re true to yourself, you know that you can’t really control your usage of social media. There’s so much on that space and you seriously need a break from all those atimes. Regulate the time spent there. I’ve seen a lot of people begin to question their solid principles, question the existence of GOD because they keep feeding from social media. What you constantly consume has the ability to change your psyche, change your habits, change you entirely as a person. How about we go back to the bible? Yes I know, some of us genuinely believe that the bible is just another book, but it’s not. How about you go and read it? Why don’t you tell GOD to prove HIMSELF to you? Ask HIM to reveal HIMSELF. You open the bible and look up to the heavens and ask for an understanding of the scriptures, ask for understanding of what you’re reading. I can tell you for free that answers to your questions are in the bible, I love to call it the word. If you seek HIM with all your heart, you’ll find HIM. Honestly, you won’t find HIM by scrolling through social media for the most part of your day.

Social media is a powerful tool that can be used positively and negatively. I find that the negativity is more rampant , probably not but it’s definitely very loud and catches people’s attention easily. If you don’t take time to detoxify, you’ll be so eaten up that you’ll begin to lose yourself without knowing, trust me. We don’t even realize what’s going on. So yeah, you can deactivate your account sometimes, uninstall the app sometimes, whatever works for you. I mean it’s no news that people have become mentally unstable because of social media, people have even lost their lives! Is it the false narratives on the soace? The cyber bullying? This isn’t fictional right? We hear these kinds of stuff. So I’m really just stating facts. It’s not a space for you to put spirit, soul and body. Look for something fun to do away from the screen, there’s a whole lot; swimming, playing ball, working on new ideas or concepts, taking walks(you can get inspired in the process), really take time to admire nature(another activity that can inspire), and study the word, pray. Close your eyes, talk to GOD, ask HIM those burning questions I’m your heart. You’ll feel renewed and rejuvenated afterwards. Thank me later. The real life is outside social media. Look around you, not in your screens.